blackpeanut.com

Woke up in the morning to follow Ryan to his site. For your information, he is an interior designer with his own company. So, if you happen to need any interior design job done, please kindly leave a message! I’m advertising for him for free here. LOL.

I tagged along since I got nothing much to do.

A shot from a high up building.

And later after that I visited my aunt near Times Square and managed to ’stone’ there for a few hours. Too many things changed.

I suddenly felt the feeling of unemployment. It is a kind of fear actually. This is a crossroad, where I’m practically somebody yet nobody. Anyway, not going to that sad part of my life.

And then I took a walk to the LRT and thought that I should go find something interesting to shoot at. I previously saw some 10+ photographers at the green field beside Pudu Jail and decided to stop by.

So this is what they offer there.

Went to wait for somebody to finish work and forced her to occupy my 1 hour wait in KLCC before my dinner.

Later on met up with Ah Pop for dinner.

Jason with his Sony a700.

Me with his Sony a700

Meeting him makes me understand that I need lenses. I NEED LENS!

It is just the same like shouting ‘I need MONEY’.

Grrr…

By the way, I wonder if there will be people hiring me to snap their events or not. Desperately in need of a part-time job before I get my posting!

We had some almost 2 weeks of pediatric surgery in 7th hospital. Taught by one of the most experience doctor in this field, I think I learned a lot, be in medically, personality wise, and the idea towards life. He is a very old doctor, and a very good one as well.

Putting myself in the field of surgery is one of my dream. I had the chance to have this short conversation of asking an old surgeon like him, what he thinks about surgery, and what is his definition of a good surgeon. Surprisingly, he said that the diagnostic part is more important than any other things. Skills could be learned from time to time, if you can’t do the operation properly the first time, try the second time, try the tenth time. But the skill to diagnose and claim that the patient has a surgical pathology must be acquired during med school itself. And that skill shall be refined and updated.

He likes photography. He said that he started taking pictures of his patients since 2nd year of med school. And now each day we just go to class, sit there, and enjoy all the slides and x-rays, everything he took with his camera for the passed 20 years as a pediatric surgeon. We saw crazy stuffs, and he would tell the story of each patient like it happened yesterday, he would remember their names, he would happily said that who is alive and who is not.

He has white hair, yet when he talks about medicine, you see sparks in his eye. It is like he is some medical junkie. New info, new tactics, new technique, and at the same time, would sit down and look back at all the correct AND wrong decision that he had made through out his practice, and remind us that we should remember this and that so that the same thing shall not happen again.

I respect surgeons. But pediatric surgeons are like one step more superior than surgeons. Why? Operating on a 70kg big size man is different to operating a 5 months of baby who just only learned how to sit, or a newborn who just only learned how to breathe. Small veins, fragile skin, small abdomen, even their bones are not fully grown yet.

He sparks my interest in photography like adding NOS to fire -_-’

He even recorded those weird cases that he encountered. Like babies inside a baby, crazy foreign body inside the GIT, all kinds of big size malignancy.

You should see his black and white pictures. They are real classics. And no doubt all his collections would seriously cost a whole lot if he wants to sell it. But I guess it is his life already.

No matter how, I think I’ll start taking more pictures nowadays! Let’s start with a pic of him explaining a x-ray.

Бессаров Виктор Иванович / Bessarov Victor Ivanovich

One of his many collections. Ok, I don’t think I’ll collect babies but maybe their pictures.

At a discussion about whether the patient has renal failure or not and was talking about GFR.
J : “The handwriting is so bad, I don’t know this is 80 or 800. Sigh”
C : “Maybe it is 80, because 800ml/min is quite impossible.”
J : “But it is said that it is possible to have polyuria”
Me : “I agree with 80, 800 is a bit ridiculous”
The debate went on, lotsa ‘useless’ brainstorming. And teacher came in.
J : “I don’t know this is 80 or 800, the handwriting is too bad”
Teacher : “What’s the difference?”

The next day when I think back… Laughed like stupid. A bunch of fools. LOL.

Feedback of the week.
If you already chronically showed that you are somebody who is lack of discipline, it is useless to try to show urself by showcasing your ‘pseudo-interest’ in any of the discussing matters. You and I both know that you are just ‘acting’ to be in the room when it is so obvious ur mind if floating somewhere in Mars. This is the exact situation when you open your mouth, the statement that come out feels so stupid that it was just being discussed few mins ago.

Sorry for being a bad ass :P

By the way, my surname in the Chinese history is famous for losing the whole empire because of a beautiful woman, and later on involves sleeping on hard bed and taste bile everyday to remind ourselves to seek for revenge. I’m just merely acting according to my nature :P

Hi, today I’m going to introduce you all my new idol - Sungha Jung! I think he is only 13, what’s so special about him is that he is born with big talent.

Another 300 years to play like him. And his guitar is signed by Thomas Leeb! You know who is Thomas Leeb? Go google it. Haha. Man, even in my dream I wouldn’t dream of playing the guitar like he did. He is officially labeled insane by me.

Anyway, holiday is relaxing. Hehe. A bit of this and that. I don’t really have the CNY mood anyway but hey, for those who are celebrating it, be happy! I wish the next CNY will come pretty fast and before I know it, I’ll be back at home eating homemade cookies.

Regarding to the previous post when my ‘friend’ who photocopied my work and passed up as his, today, I found out that he is not the only one doing that. I saw the ‘my’ paper being used as ‘their’ work for at least 5 of them!

I decided to confront him by ’signaling’ to him that how come my paper is with the other group of people (I have no doubts my work will later be sold in ‘black market’ for the coming years for their juniors and so on, yea, they are THAT useless to do their own homework). He had a look at them, and gave a ‘troubled’ face (as in showing me he didn’t know how did that happen) and continued talking and playing around like kids. He is so ‘obviously’ do not care about what happens next as long as his work is done and he is safe to get the sign tomorrow for the exam.

No I didn’t talk to him and didn’t express my anger too much.

No I didn’t curse him aloud (only inside my heart, which kinda pollute my cute and kind cardiac muscles).

No I didn’t took a knife and stab him (even thou my brain ran over the scenario few times and think how the forensic experts are going to catch me if I do that).

Yes I proceeded to think what is the perfect way to kill somebody.

Yes I ended up thinking that it is IMPOSSIBLE. Sooner or later people will know about it.

Luckily this is only homework, and not something which I would want to protect with my life.

BUT

He is so going to suffer for every single chance that I have in the future. DAMN IT!

And now I should pray for the strictest teachers my uni can offer to be our teacher in the coming sem. Even thou I’m going to suffer, I’ll be happy to see him suffering more than me.

Yea, I’m those kind of people who are happy to see him suffer.

I’m THAT EVIL!

Okay, enough for the hate. I’ll keep that to myself and update you all about what I do to him after on. Mean while, let’s have some snowy great weather picture to sooth the day.

Near the river bank.

See that Lenin’s face on top of that building?

It is a sunny day!

p/s - my housemates are still in Opthalmology exam. Hopefully they don’t get mentally molested by their teacher.

My ‘friend’ aka. classmate aka. the one that i hate and like to play prank to, came over to my house to look at my homework to see how to write the post-mortem report. I, for being holy and helpful and all the good qualities in the world, decided to let him copy my word file, thinking that he would produce something by his own since he has the time to do that.

And the next thing I know.

He passed up exactly the same thing that I did!

WTF!!!!!!

#$%%$^$&^%$@#$

No I didn’t confront him. If I do it, he will say something like, he added a word, and I can still investigate on and will found out that there are no exceptions, and then he noticed that I found out that he lied, then he will say he did the covering page and changed the name, and look at me with his shitty face and smile, and I’ll be damn piss. He even printed out the cover with my name on it, and after realizing it, he gotta take it out and thus the reason why he need to do his own first page. ARGH.

People do not change.

Some people are really hopeless.

WASTE OF MY TIME. BUT NOW I’M BLOGGING IT BECAUSE I CAN’T TAKE IT ANYMORE.

See? I was correct to just leave him on the tram when I know it was going to the wrong place.

And from now on, I’ll enjoy every moment of torturing him. I’ll not cover for him anymore (not that I did, but I kept my mouth shut).

Yay, today onwards, see the destructive power of Peanut.

Anyway, I just need to mention that he is working part time and the school will kick him home to where he came from.

See, I would still NEED to sympathize him for not giving him the worst lessons ever. I think I’ll start next semester, revealing all his stupid lies (stupid because he doesn’t know how to lie, no technique at all).

Smart people are cunning people.

I shall revenge!

Remember when I was a kid, I wanted to be a hero. Who doesn’t? Everytime I watch Mac Gyver or Kamen Rider, I would imagine myself become them and jump all over the house. And no I do not like Power Rangers because I think their dinasours and cars are a bit too much. Plus Power Rangers consist of 5 people while I’m only 1. Acting out multiple personalities is dangerous and tiring and sounder bipolar.

But, it is not about the movie character or the heroes or the gadgets.

Ultimately, I wanna be good in something. Something that other people are not good in. That will make me unique. That will make me stand out. I was so timid and like to hide among my friends during primary schools. One of my respected teacher told me that - what kind of animals you prefer, those that live in herds, or those that move alone? Predators hunt alone. Eagles don’t fly around with the whole family and lions do not move in 10 or 20.

It makes sense. If you wanna be special, you need to be alone, or be in a very small group with a very refined skill on something or about something.

So far, I’m just half a pale of water here and there. I’m never pro in something. Not to even say semi pro. Everyday I envy those that find their places in this world. People that are famous because they got something which is belong to them. I know what people say when they see some people like me. ‘Being a part of a big team is also something special. All we need is to do our part well and that’s it.’ But I beg to differ. I would not want to be only a part. I wanna be pro… in something.

And hopefully that something is not too far for me to discover!

Heck. Ulcer pain.

“The Friend” - please notice the open inverted commas. He is the most-mentioned characters in my blog after my housemates I think. Haha. This is taken during the time when we are suppose to go see our beloved patients in our respective wards.

He is pushing my friend’s limit by falling asleep / fishing during class. Our limit is seriously ‘limited’ for him! See, so you don’t find me letting him sleep pass the station as something sinful right?! And besides that, he asked permission to go back home earlier like 1 hr before the end of class! Wonder what kind of excuses he used!

He thinks that we are stupid. Seriously! And he likes to mumble when people ask questions. Those kind of ‘I-know-the-answer-but-wanna-talk-softly’ mumble. If you stop the whole conversation and ask him what he thinks. He will produce some sound that remind you of some syllabus in a ‘fade-to-no-sound’ transition. Damn stress!

Basically I gave up on him long ago (must be some time between morning and 12 afternoon on the first day he got assigned to our group).

And I met 2 patients that keep on saying ‘I don’t know’ when I ask them questions. Sigh. So not cooperative. Nevermind, I’ll have more time to eat my bento then. I think i’ll stick to bar code until I found something nicer. Have a nice Wednesday. Cardiology finishing soon.

She said so happily that she got something to show me. I was depicted as a happy pig but with my name SPELLED WRONG! How can that happen? Damn malu la the girl. After getting some scolding and all, she drew this..

Her absolute bu-shuang-ness / beh syok-ness is fully depicted in the picture. I think the pig resembles her more than me at that moment. Alas, my name is written properly (in Russian characters). Sweat!

And she some more have the guts to say:-

 Vivien tan says:hey

 Vivien tan says:i must say

 Vivien tan says:my drawing

 Vivien tan says:A+++ wei

p/s: You dare me to blog about this, now what? I gotta test your spelling from time to time. 

p/s 2: Oh, by the way, the girl that can spell my name wrong is Vivien Tan (at least I took the effort to spell your name correctly wey). Can link to her blog on my side bar. LOL!

p/s 3: And what kind of people conteng on medical books wey.. Hahaha.

To light a light, it to cast a shadow…

It is inevitable that when you wanna be something good or do something right, you might end up being partially bad or did something bad somehow in the process.

Each of us grow up knowing this world from one side or another. Some think that the world is good, while others think that the world is bad. But I found something else. It is called, the condition.

People do a lot of things because the conditions allow them to. Each of the feelings can be tested. You say you love somebody, that is because the conditions were arranged that there is only one person for you to love, and that only happens if that person loves you back. IF the condition is that you have a lot of people to love, and everybody love you back just as much, then you will have problem loving only one.

People think that they have strong principles. But the principles are often untested. You say that you would not do this or that, or you would do this or that when you face with that condition, but those statements are unproven. How can one knows what to do when he/she didn’t experience it first hand?

If a cup of water is put in front of you, added with sugar, salt, pepper,vinegar and another 5 unknown ingredients. Before drinking it, will you say that the water is sweet? or perhaps sour? or salty? Will you be able to say that you will only taste sweet when you drink it? or only sour?

Most of the time, only the one who stood, and experience that condition, is worthy to talk about their principles and experience. Because their principles are tested. Hypothesis is proven. And thus, only those people, have the rights to tell you that ‘I told you so!’